time for baby no. 2 ?!

Are you planning for baby no. 2? Well, as for me & Adrian, we have no plans of having it till 2009, i hope (crossfingers) lol! =) But I just want to share this article to all my readers who are planning to, but not yet decided. Hope this will help.

Here's an honest look at the pros and cons of doing it now or waiting awhile:

Less Than 2 Years Apart

PROS

Live-in friends. Kids born close together often grow up as pals, says Sybil Hart, Ph.D., associate professor of human development and family studies at Texas Tech University, in Lubbock. Even when they fight, they have a greater incentive to work things out because they rely on each other to be playmates. Kids under 2 also tend to be less jealous of a new sibling because, at that age, they're not as aware of the change in their status in the family.

Similar stages. It's much easier to entertain and occupy kids who are close in age. You don't have to read Goodnight Moon to one and then Harry Potter to the other. One's not begging you to play Candy Land while the other insists on Monopoly. You can all dance to Barney tunes, and nobody thinks it's stupid.

Shorter diaper duty. You condense the grunt work. There may be more diapers at once, more whining at once, and more battles over whose Sippy cup is whose, but when you're done, you're done.

Dad's on board. Having two kids in two years can actually be good for your marriage, precisely because it's so demanding. "When you've got just one kid, Mom often ends up with the baby and Dad often retreats -- because he feels left out and his wife is particular about having things done her way," Dr. Hart says. But once the new baby arrives, the husband is yanked into action -- and both parents feel that they're in this together.
Time to work. If you want to stay home full-time and wait until your kids are school-age before going back to work, you won't have to put your career on hold for too long.

CONS

Constant exhaustion. No doubt about it: Having kids back-to-back is physically grueling. And having two little ones who aren't very verbal and who get frustrated easily can be emotionally draining, says Laurie Kramer, Ph.D., professor of applied family studies at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. It's even harder if you don't have family or friends nearby to lend a hand.

Intense expenses. Double diaper and child-care costs can really add up. And don't forget, you'll be paying two college-tuition bills at the same time.
Job juggling. "Because of all the increased demands, moms often feel pressured to leave their job once they have their second child," Dr. Kramer says. Taking two maternity leaves in quick succession can also be a financial strain for your family and can affect your career track.

2 to 4 Years Apart

PROS

Babying for both. Your first child has a couple of precious years to bask in your undivided attention. "I feel as if my 3-year-old son, Bilal, got to be a baby for as long as he needed to," says Hena Khan, of Rockville, Maryland. "Now he's old enough for preschool, so I can have alone time with the baby without feeling guilty about it. If there were two kids competing for my lap, I'd be frustrated."

Play pals. The age difference is small enough that your kids will still find activities they both enjoy. A 3-year-old can get a kick out of introducing his baby brother to toys, and a 2-year-old and a 5-year-old can make forts together.

Less marriage stress. Having kids a few years apart gives your relationship a little breathing space. You won't have to constantly negotiate about the duties you'd face with two babies underfoot. And because you're getting a little more rest than couples with two tiny tots, you're more likely to have energy left for each other.

Recovery time. Waiting three years gives you a chance to get your own life in order -- to exercise your way back to your old body and to mentally recuperate from the rigors of a first baby, says psychologist Debbie Glasser, Ph.D., past chair of the National Parenting Education Network.

CONS

Reluctant twosome. Siblings may resent each other because they always have to do things together, Dr. Hart says. Kids closer together like watching the same movie; kids farther apart wouldn't even be asked to. But kids only two to four years apart are often forced into a companionship that they don't necessarily want.

Competition for Mommy. Unlike an older child, a 3-year-old is not as occupied with friends and may have a harder time adapting to a new sibling, according to Dr. Kramer's research. Chances are, your firstborn is used to having you as an attentive playmate, and she'll be frustrated whenever you're not free to do a puzzle or play with her.

More Than 5 Years Apart

PROS

Extra hands. If you're lucky, your big kid may morph into a little helper. When you change your baby's diaper, you can ask your older child to fetch the wipes.

Special roles. Your older one gets to be a nurturing role model, and your younger one benefits from wise advice. Throughout life, your firstborn will be able to guide his sibling through cliques, college applications, relationships, and landing that first job.

Financial stability. Several years down the road, you're likely to be in a better position to buy a bigger home and to afford all those child-related expenses. Your college tuition bills will also be spaced farther apart.

Calm and confidence. Let's face it: You know more now than you did a few years ago. That extra time and perspective may help you and your spouse feel like less-anxious parents. Plus, you realize how quickly kids grow up -- and you're bound to enjoy the second one even more.

CONS

Divided lives. Your children will be at separate developmental stages, and it can be exhausting to meet both their needs at once. When you try to read your older child a book, you may have to simultaneously stop your younger one from eating it. You and your spouse may often be paired off with one child, and that can leave little time to be together.

Different childhoods. Your kids won't share as much as they would if they were closer in age or had some of the same family memories.

Back to the grind. It can be tough to wrench yourself back into baby mode after getting used to the freedom of having an older child. You've gotten into the habit of hopping into the car without having to worry about diapers and bottles, and you no longer have to turn down invitations that conflict with naptime. Mentally, it can be a struggle to prepare yourself for stretch marks, midnight feedings, and the constant attention that a baby requires.

All content here, including advice from doctors and other health professionals, should be considered as opinion only. Always seek the direct advice of your own doctor in connection with any questions or issues you may have regarding your own health or the health of others.